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Artists’ Top Albums of 2014: Part 3/5


The coffee machine at Metal Sucks.

The coffee machine at Metal Sucks.

When the Metal State hyperspace pigeon arrived at the planet which is inhabited only by Metal Sucks, they welcomed him with two barrels of birdshot. That was such a kind gesture.

The barrels were more like 44-gallon drums. They contained birdshot in the form of plutonium pellets. It rains plutonium on the Metal Sucks planet but most of it washes away during the sulphuric acid floods. Vince and Axl at Metal Sucks spared our pigeon the effort of hunting for food. Hyperspace pigeons luuurve plutonium.

The pigeon delivered the note thanking Vince and Axl for sharing their huge lists of musicians’ favourite albums of 2014. He didn’t stay for coffee. Over there they drink it too strong even for him. They filter it though Cerenkov radiation, the blue glow that comes from the cooling water in nuclear reactors.

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